Something which deeply and intensely disturbed me ….
Have noticed
several young girls who come as house helps. Also have had conversations with
several ladies who come home selling different stuff from their gardens, or
those who we come across while waiting for the occasional bus.
With so many
initiatives by the government of Tamil Nadu, the education of girl children is pretty
high. Invariably, the girls finish their ten years or sometimes even twelve
years of schooling. After this major milestone, very few move onto entering a
college. Mainly because of financial reasons and probably unaware of the
opportunities for them
These girls
goto nearby town to work in grocery stores, any shop, petrol bunks and the like
on 7 day , 10 hour work weeks . The girls are preferred over the boys because
they are docile, punctual, regular and minimal maintenance. The girls prefer
these jobs because they are generally given a small amount for their marriage
when it happens. So thus life goes on for a year or two. When they near around
nineteen or twenty years of age – it is marriage time.
The groom is
generally known to the girls family – sometimes the uncle, or the uncle’s son
or the aunt’s son or somewhat related. Fast forward five years. Several, several
of these girls have two children and are widowed. They either come back to the
parent’s house or in some cases left to fend for themselves . They again start
going to the shops where they worked pre-marriage or start going as house helps,
if they do not have someone at home to take care of their children.
What
happens? why do we have such a high number of young widows ?
If the girls
are immensely lucky, the men go abroad -
Singapore, Malaysia, Dubai, Saudi or some such country and support the family .
For the others, a very very miniscule percentage of men take care of the family
and give a stable life to them. The majority spend a very small amount on the
family and the major part of the wages goto drinking. The drinking knows no
time of day. The shop opens in the morning and stays open till late in the
night. At any place in the village or
even under roadside trees, at any time of the day there are quiet a few
drinking.
Most
unfortunately , they become sick with such heavy drinking and least attention
to health and die. Some , in their inebriated state drown into some water
bodies , some fall off from some construction sites, meet with road accidents
and die ….. with no life insurance and
leaving nothing for the surviving family to fall back on.
The girls
after a few years of miserable, physically abusive married life are now with
the burden of raising the children, running the family for mostly as long as
they live.
Who has to
take a different step to change this vicious cycle ?
